Yesterday, James Cromwell, the Star Trek actor, glued his hand to a counter in a Manhatten Starbucks. He was protesting up charges for vegan milk.
Starbucks is pretty liberal
But I guess not enough
James Cromwell showed up
He began to huff and puff
Wearing his PETA shirt
He showed he didn't agree
Protesting other liberals
Yet still supporting AOC
He leaned on the counter
With a hand of super glue
Then he read a declaration
Of some ridiculous view
Most of these people are radicals
They cannot be rational
Plus I thought PETA meant
People eating tasty animals
Everyone got stuck listening
To what James had to say
But I think most customers there
Just wanted to pick up their latte
I can make these life decisions
Now that I'm a big boy
But I'm not into almond milk
And I'm not into soy
I'm just not into vegan milk
I won't listen to his rebuke
Honestly, when I smell oat milk
It makes me wanna puke
Long ago James lost his marbles
He seems arrogant and haughty
But I thought for sure at that counter
He'd say beam me up scotty
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